Knowledge Spelled Wrong

Digi Boyz - Go To Bed Drunk Wake Up Hammered (Mixtape)

2010-12-08T12:50:00.003-05:00

^CLICK THERE^

The first official mixtape release from Digi Boyz is finally available for free download. Digi Boyz is the joint collaboration of Nahlidge and Colorz. Featuring production by Vybe Beats, HS Traxx, Bass Productions and more. Here's part of an article that my boy Penny Shaw did about the mixtape that explains the thought/creative process behind the mixtape.

After some ups and downs working with a few local artists, Nahlidge most recent release is an album that he worked on with his hometown friend/artist Colorz. They titled the album "Go To Bed Drunk, Wake Up Hammered". The name pretty much speaks for itself. Nahlidge spoke about it by saying..

"During this 5-6 month time, that was pretty much our mind state. Getting drunk every night. Waking up. Going to work. Clocking out. Hit up the liquor store. Then get drunk and record some more. The result is a 16 track and 2 skit album that reflects on the party life, alcohol, relationship issues, alcohol, and other stuff dabbled with a bit more alcohol. With a light story line undertone that goes from start to finish progressing as you get deeper into the album, you`ll notice the sense of commercial appeal mixed with thought out rhymes. While at other times, just catchy hooks, bridges and verses too alcohol inspired to be anywhere close to thought provoking. Listening to the album it`s clear to see that me and Colorz are complete opposites when it comes to making music. But somehow we found a mixture of styles that works out."

Check out the mixtape. Let me know what y`all think about it. If you like the music. Spread the word to your friends, fam, secret lover, pet canary, landlord, boss, whoever. Search for Digi Boyz fan page on Facebook and like us. You the fans are the ones that are gonna help us spread the music that way more than we ever could. It`ll be much appreciated. DIGI!

So here`s the plan...

2010-12-06T23:10:00.000-05:00

I was thinkin` about it. I`m 25. And if I`m plannin` on doin` somethin` with this rap shit. I`m way behind schedule. So I`m takin` a page outta my dude Penny Shaw`s book. I`m givin` my self a 3 month deadline to have a solo mixtape done. And addin` an ultimatum to the deal. If I don`t have it done in that time frame I`m quittin` with this pursuin` music seriously thing. I should`ve been takin` it a lot more seriously than a do a long ass time ago. Instead I kept givin` myself excuses for why I wasn`t. So I figure if this doesn`t motivate me then nothin` ever will.

I`m goin` to be keepin` this blog updated with the process. Videos. Songs. Verses. Etc. My first week goal is goin` to be gatherin` beats for the mixtape. I`m goin` to get about 30-40 beats together. Then go from there and start writin` tracks. Once I get a good 3-4 written. Hit the studio and get this shit started.

If you`re a fan of my music. Keep checkin` back to stay updated on what`s goin` on with this project and whatever other randomness I post up in between.

DIGI!

GrindHouse Presents: Nahlidge - Growing Pains (Mixtape)

2010-09-15T16:14:00.002-04:00

GrindHouse Presents: Nahlidge - Growing Pains. A collection of various verses and tracks recorded between 2003 until now to show the growth of me as an artist. The evolution process isn't always pretty. Some cringe worthy material as well as some dope verses/tracks on here. Check it out.

Click Here To Dowload!

I get drunk and act a fool...

2010-09-13T17:23:00.000-04:00

If you know me, you already know this lol. The result of that was a fun weekend. I think the main part to do with me gettin` so shit faced was the fact that I didn`t drink at all durin` the week. I think Ima try to go with that game plan this week again. I needa calm down on drinkin` anyway. Save it for the weekends. I think it makes for a more enjoyable experience. But on another note. It`s Monday. And I`m in a pretty damned good mood. I usually hate Mondays. But minus the doo doo weather outside. It`s goin` by pretty quick and nothin` has got on my nerves yet lol. But yea. Just a little update. But to make this worthwhile. Here`s some footage from a Digi set @ a block party this summer.

End Of Summer Blues?????

2010-09-07T18:10:00.000-04:00

So it hasn`t been the best last month or whatever time frame it`s been. But I`m still dealin` with it. Movin` forward. Even when things try to set me back. My hours got cut at work. Quit talkin` to the chick I was talkin` to for a while. Loss of a fam member. The feelin` that I`m takin` a step back with my music grind. All that mixed in a bowl and spoon fed starts to get to a nigga. So yea. I`m sort of in a hole that I`m tryna steady climb out of. Just can`t seem to find the means to do it. I think I just need to get away for a while and clear my head. Then channel this shit through music to help me get through it. Or somethin`. Need to better myself before I give myself the chance to drag somebody else down with me. I need a mental release of the shit I been goin` thru for the past however long it`s been. Seems like over the past few years I got more depressed memories than good ones. Not really a good thing in my book. Idk. I just needa get away from everythin` for a while and free my mind of the stress that`s been buildin` up. But usually what happens is I worry about shit and it just keeps pilin` on. This shit is prolly soundin` repetitive as fuck lol. So Ima stop it here.

Everythin` Planned Is Imperfect...

2010-08-03T14:55:00.000-04:00

It`s startin` to hit me again for some reason. Random as fuck like it always does. But it`s not as bad as previous years. There`s always a random time of year where I catch a depressed feelin` for a while. Where I just want to be by myself and not bothered by nobody. Usually people rely on bein` around friends and family to be happy. But I`m ass backwards. My alone time usually cures it lol. It`s usually a lot worse than I feel now. So this isn`t a complaint type of blog. It`s to say I hope it`s a sign that shit is gettin` better. So stress doesn`t build up like it has in the past and crumble me all at the same time. I guess we really do live and learn. I`m learnin` how to deal with things better. Some things anyway lol. Not all. Slowly but surely though. DAMN. I`m turnin` 25 in 3 MONTHS! Slowwwww down age. A quarter of a damned century?? Seriously? lol. Oh well. Let`s make the best of it and keep things movin` lol. DiGi!

Lockdown Therapy II: Hosted By The 6th Asylum

2010-07-15T18:39:00.000-04:00

A collection of Unsigned Artist Across The World. for more info on getting on these free promotional tapes follow - www.Twitter.com/the6thasylum

I have a track on here with Life Sentence (my group with Ha` Rizon and Hosea for those of you that don`t know. And I have a solo track on here. So if that`s not reason enough to download the joint, EVERY track on here is dope. A bunch of dope up and coming independent artists doin` they`re thing. And you get to hear it for free, what`s better than that???

Click here to Download it off of Dat Piff

The DopeHouse Is Under Construction

2010-07-15T14:59:00.000-04:00

With Go To Be Drunk Wake Up Hammered completed and in the duplication stage. It`s time to move on to the next project. And that is DopeHouse. A mixtape that was the brain child of my homie Lear and Jim D. 2 MC`s reppin` Dope Sqaud. (www.thefututureisdope.blogspot.com). They were in the begginin` stages of cookin` up a mixtape and my dude Lear asked me if I wanted to get down with them on it. So here we bring you Dope Squad and GrindHouse collabin` on what`s already turnin` out to be a dope project. We have about 4-5 tracks we done already started on. Beats for the mixtape are already picked out. So the completion time of this should of been pretty quick since we all work fast. Just hit a little bump in the road with Jim D bein` outta commission for recordin` for a little bit. But in the mean time we still got the pot simmerin` up a mean sauce for those eargasms to come. 3 different MC`s bringin` 3 different styles that blend mix in the pot and chef up somethin` lovely for your listenin` pleasure. I`ll keep y`all updated with how the mixtape is comin` along every now and then. So keep checkin` back for them updates! GrindHouse!

Also. Digi Boyz t-shirts, polos and hoodies are on the way. We recently got a limited amount shipped to us to see what they look like and they`re lookin` good. So if you wanna help support the Digi movement get at me if you`re interested in buyin` a t-shirt, polo or hoody when we get more in. DIGI!

Let`s Face It...

2010-07-01T22:41:00.000-04:00

No matter how hard you try, there`s some things in life that we as humans will just never be able to have any control over. Some things we won`t be able to change. That "thing" ranges from something very minuscule to something of super duper crazy knock your socks off right before you slip and step into a pile of fresh hot, maybe even discolored dependin` on the day, dog poop kind of importance. And the simple fact is. We can`t do shit about it. Just gotta take life as it comes and learn how to deal with it. And on the other hand, there are things that we can control/change that we completely just brush off because we focus/worry too much about the things we have no control over. And as human beings, honestly we have every right to do that. But what we also need to know is that these situations are the ones where we can come out with a lesson learned. Or time wasted. Depends on how you choose to handle it at the time. I mean, I know we all like to have that one person to talk to about things and go to for advice. But at the end of the day, that person`s advice isn`t goin` to play that much of a difference in your final decision. It`s completely up to you, and whether you want to admit it or not, you could care less about advice given or what someone has to say. I think we just pretend to so that we have an excuse to try and put the blame on someone else for something happens when it back fires in our face. The point of this is because I think people need to know that they need to make they`re own decisions. Don`t play along the line of lettin` someone else make a decision for you because it seems right at the moment and the stars are perfectly aligned with the moon on a clear starry night and you can connect the dots to form the shape of a head over heels megaman butterfly in love. Even if you think that lettin` it happen is makin` someone else happy. Fuck that. In the end the only person you should truly worry about makin` happy is this person right here *points fingers at myself*. Come on, do it. Say "I need to make him/her happy" while pointin` frantically at yourself to the point that you look like a loony. It`ll make you feel better, trust me. And where the beauty comes in with this is, IF the person that you are worried so much about pleasin` really accepts you for who you are then they shouldn`t need to try and mold you into somethin` else. And if they don`t. Then they needa kick rocks with a bare foot that just got done walkin` to pick Diddy up some cheese cake in a Making Da Band re-run. DEUCES!

The road continues....

2010-06-07T23:34:00.001-04:00

Aight so my boy Ha`Rizon (name pending lol - peep his blog here: http://www.skyhigh718.blogspot.com) gave me inspiration to get serious with a solo project after seein` put himself up to doin` a 120 day project. Dunno if Ima do his whole 120 day thing lol. But I`m gonna officially start on a project this weekend. I`m thinkin` it`s gonna be an EP to lead up to "A Reason For Everything". Not sure of the name of the project or the direction I`m gonna take it yet. But I think I`m gonna put a mixtape on hold for a while and get some original material out there first before goin` the mixtape route. I`ll keep y`all updated with what`s goin` on and I start to get a grasp on where I`m goin` with this as it starts to get more cemented. Might take a little while. So bare with me people!

Check out my boy`s EP

2010-06-07T23:28:00.000-04:00

http://www.reelofficial.com/2010/06/try-harder/

Blackanese - Try Harder

He reppin` for the West Coast. Devious Films. Got Flow crew.

6 track`s deep. I`m listenin` to the 4th one. Shit`s dope so far. Not a long cd. So quit actin` like you ain`t got time to peep it and give it a listen.

On to the next one.

2010-05-25T17:07:00.000-04:00

So at the point where me and Colorz are wrappin` up the recordin` process of the mixtape between tonight and 2morrow. Finally time to start on my solo joint that I`ve been puttin` off for the longest time lol. And for the people who listen to my music and have been wonderin` what happened to the not so commercial soundin` Nahlidge, that`s who you can expect to hear on my solo mixtape. Even though I keep it real no matter what crowd/listener I`m aimin` for. Expect that raw, honest, open rap when you hear this mixtape. Not sure when I`m gonna have it done yet. But I`m hopin` within the next 2 months. Sounds like a good goal. Already plannin` on havin` a few features on it. Open to workin` with new people too. So if you`re an artist and are readin` this. Get @ me if you`re interested in collabin` on somethin` (nahlidge508@gmail.com).

As far as the Digi Boyz mixtape. Expect a sampler soon to give y`all a taste of what to expect from that joint. Then just gotta finish up some mixin` details on it and seein` about havin` this DJ we been talkin` to host it. And then it`ll be walla! I`ll let you know where you can get it when it`s done. I`m hyped about it. Wanna know what y`all think cuz we been puttin` in some work for this joint over the last few months. Check back within the next couple days for the sampler. PEACE!

Hypocritical Much???

2010-04-17T19:09:00.000-04:00

I don`t want you to want me, cause I know one day you`ll want more

I don`t want you to need me, when I`m walkin` out the front door

I don`t want you to love me, cause I have no heart to love

But I guess I`m just a hypocrite, cause I want all the above

Work Hard If You Wanna Play Hard

2010-04-05T17:29:00.000-04:00

So I was havin` a convo with my boy Alex the other day about this music grind. He was tellin` me about his meetin` with Rocwilder he had a little over a week ago. And he was tellin` me some of the advice dude was givin` him. One that stood out to me was "as an unsigned artist, you need to work like you`re goin` to put out an album every 3 months" or somethin` close to that. And I thought about that in retrospect to how established acts go long periods of time without puttin` out material (i.e. Eminem, Dr. Dre, Pharoahe Monch, Heltah Skeltah, etc.) in contrast to how often a newer artist has to stay out in the public eye just to keep the audience`s attention. We have it hard as a new artist tryin` to get heard lol. But I love every minute of it. Besides the fact that stayin` on the grind is only gonna help me get better at what I do, why would I complain about havin` to actually make music if that`s what I wanna do as my career? And the drive to want to actually be heard and spread out further than my hometown makes me take up that "album every 3 months" challenge with open arms. Even Wayne works that hard and look at how big he is. That`s the dedication I think you need to have to this music business if you wanna make it somewhere. So instead of look at it as a challenge. Look at is as preparation for when you get that chance or that break. A lotta people say "the lucky ones make it". Well to me. Luck with when preparation meets opportunity and you make the best out of it. With that said. Be on the lookout for my first solo mixtape which is goin` to be a compilation of my older material datin` back from when I first started recordin` up until a couple years ago. The concept behind it is to show my growth as an artist. A few people have asked me "aren`t you afraid that they`ll hear that old stuff and think that`s what you`re still only capable of now?". My answer is no. I have the material to back that up too. I just want to give the people that listen to my music the chance to experience the not so paved roads of me as an MC lol. I`ll keep y`all updated on that. DIGI!

Digi All Day!

2010-03-01T15:44:00.002-05:00

So "Go To Bed Drunk, Wake Up Hammered" is half way completed. Me and Colorz just needa get in the studio and bang out the last half. Prolly gonna be in there all this week and bang out a good 3-5 tracks and keep it movin`. THEN we just have to do all the fine tunin` and all the lovely behind the scenes shit that we needa do and it should be ready for y`all soon! By the way. I seen an unfinished version of the cover and shit`s CRACK! Digi!

Colorz got a showcase in NYC this weekend in front of Young Money, Interscope and Universal. So we gonna be out there this weekend. Ima see if I can get some promotin' done in between doin' what else we needa do. See if we can do some networkin' with people and make a few connections and see what happens. Either way we gonna come back home with somethin' accomplished.

That`s what`s on the schedule for this week. I`m puttin` my solo mixtape work on the back burner until this Digi Boyz one gets done. When I first started it I said I was gonna work on both and do my shit in between. But I rather just focus on one project and get it done. Especially with how quickly this Digi Boyz mixtape is gettin` done. Just gonna stay in that mind state and BOOM POW! Drop it for the fans and potential fans then turn around get right back to work on my mixtape which I THINK I have a title for. But I`m not sure.

I`m also in the discussion stages of workin` on a project with my boy Eye Ronic from CT. I think me and him gonna blend well and make some crazy music. So be on the look out for that. Might have a track by me and him soon just to give y`all a little taste.

That`s what I have planned as far as "Nahlidge" projects. Other than that. Brandon Heat still got this Grind House project in the works that I`m gonna be workin` with him on. And I been talkin` to him about doin` an E.P. Might happen sooner than later, but we`ll see!

As always. You can peep the music:
www.reverbnation.com/nahlidge508
www.soundclick.com/nahlidge
www.ispinner.com/nahlidge508
www.myspace.com/nahlidge508

You can also get @ me on Twitter: www.twitter.com/nahlidge508

Or you can get @ me on FaceBook: www.facebook.com/nahlidge508

Still realizin`...

2010-02-15T22:13:00.001-05:00

Ain`t been able to keep up with this as often as I`d like to lately. Been busy tryin` to get shit off the ground with my music. That might also be the reason why I haven`t felt the need to share anythin` on here lately lol. Been keepin` my mind busy with other things and not givin` things that bother me the time of day. I`m pretty sure I`ve been aggravated about some things over the past couple weeks. But I honestly don`t remember reasons enough to "vent" like I usually do lol. But on another note. A couple days ago. I seen this quote in my little sister`s away message. "As if you could kill time without injuring eternity". And that made me look at what I`m doin` with my life now and want to push even harder with what I need to do to get what I want over time. What kick started the whole thing was somethin` one of my dude`s said to me almost a month ago now. I said somethin` along the lines of "sometimes I lose my inspiration, maybe I needa change what I keep around me". And he came back and said somethin` like "nah, just change your inspiration". And I really thought about that and put it to use. I`m really startin` to notice how I let things get me down and in the mood to just give up when in reality they have nothin` to do with me takin` care of what I need to do. And I would blame me gettin` lazy on everythin` that would bother me as a scape goat. So now that I look at it like "quit makin` excuses for yourself" and have been puttin` 100% in what I need to be doin`, it seems like the things that would aggravate the shit out of me just roll off and fade away. I don`t need that type of negative energy around me. So I`m done with puttin` myself in a position to let certain things interfere with me and my goals. And it`s kinda changin` my attitude toward certain people. I`m driftin` further and further away from the Nahlidge that would wait for people to maybe realize that they`ll be missin` out on somethin` if they leave, hopin` that they`ll come to their senses one day. And more toward the Nahlidge that looks at it like, either be down to ride with me or get left in the back roads somewhere. Since I`ve been noticin` that I`ve been lookin` at situations more like that I`ve been startin` to realize that the people who want to stay around are gonna be the ones who ride for you. The people who aren`t meant to stay around are gonna fade off. So no need to waste time hopin` that the thing you let go will come back some day.

In Search Of...

2010-02-03T03:14:00.000-05:00

Hmmm. So I had a convo with a friend today about this "findin` the right person" theme. Well somethin` along the lines of that. She was tellin` me about how things aren`t workin` out with someone that she`s been seein` and what not. I don`t mind listenin`. I`m pretty good at givin` advice and I like to let someone know my opinion whenever I can. Well to skip to the point of why I`m talkin` about this. She made a comment about "maybe the right person is right in front of us". Maybe not in those exact words. But that was the jist of it. I didn`t comment on it to her. But I took it as a low blow because she`s someone that I`ve let know that I liked her and how I felt numerous times. But what got me is that idk if she meant that or was it just a joke because she felt like bein` a punk lol. I`m pretty sure she`s made it clear to me that she doesn`t want to take our relationship past more than just a friend level. Believe me, I`ve been tryin` lol. And there`s only so much rejection I can put up with so I backed off. Not much else I can do in the situation. I`m certain that I`ve made how I felt about her clear. I let her know that the opportunity is there if she changed her mind. But still she made it known that she rather not take things there. So to come back and say a comment about the right person bein` right in front of us kinda confused me. And idk what to think. Maybe I`m thinkin` too much about it just wonderin` these things. But hey, that`s the type of person I am. Idk. Enough of me blabbin`. Bye.

I`m Startin` To Realize...

2010-01-25T15:38:00.000-05:00

How much I let things distract me from doin` what needs to be done. Whether it`s me tryin` to devote time to somethin` or someone else instead of focussin` on what I need to do. Or just a case of me bein` lazy. It tends to happen a lot lol. It`s funny how you start to notice the "not so good" things about yourself when you`re actually payin` attention and tryin` to see them. I don`t know if it`s just me. But I get caught up worryin` about or tryin` to cater to other people too much and end up slackin` on what I need to do for ME. So just another thing I need to work on more as far as gettin` better at not gettin` lost in the mist of things. It sucks havin` a big heart lol. Especially when you give everyone a chance to take advantage of it. But I`m likin` that I`m startin` to see these things and work on them for the better. Not sayin` I`m gonna completely change. Because I am who I am and I`m gonna be who I`m gonna be. But this walkin` blind thing is for the sheep.

I swear women confuse the shit out of me....

2010-01-19T01:20:00.001-05:00

Seriously. And they confuse the shit out of me in more than one way. I try to understand them. But there`s a few things that I`m clueless to hell about. So I`m gonna say what I gotta say then open up for conversation to any women who wanna comment on anythin` I say in this little rant.

First off. Though I`m pretty much to the point where it doesn`t bother me anymore. I was with someone recently. Happened to be that it was someone that I knew for quite a while. Started to get feelin`s and decided to see what happened from it. Everythin` was goin` good for about a month or so until she all of a sudden "couldn`t find time" to see me. I dealt with it for a couple weeks. But the thought of bein` with someone that knew so much about me and was someone that I would consider one of my best friends could no longer find ANY time to see me got to the point where I told myself I needed out of the situation. How you gonna tell me you can`t find ANY time AT ALL to see me? SERIOUSLY?!?!? Seems more like you don`t WANT to see me. If you did, you would find time. Even if it`s just to stop by for a few minutes and say "hi". I`m not a difficult dude. I`d be happy with that. All I`m askin` for is some face time. And I`m sorry. But bein` that it was my first attempt at bein` in a relationship again after about 3-4 years, it didn`t really leave me on a good note to want to try and hop back in a situation again lol. I don`t care how busy I am. If I WANT to be in a relationship with someone. I`m gonna go outta my way to make sure I can find some time to set aside to see that person. Even if it`s just goin` over to sleep. Face time means a lot in a growin` relationship. At least in my book it does. But maybe I`m wrong ladies. Maybe I`m not understandin`. If that`s the case, explain how I`m wrong. Because from where I stand, I don`t see how I wouldn`t be able to find ANY time to see the person I`m with. And I keep emphasizin` ANY because that`s what it was. Last time I seen her was on Thanksgivin`. Didn`t break up with her `til after New Years. Started seemin` like every reason to not be able to see me was bein` found and used. You tellin` me I can`t get 5 minutes out of a day? One night out of a week?

Ok. On to my next bone to pick with you women. This is about a friend. So if she reads this, she might hate me for a while lol. But it`s somethin` that bothers me as well. Actually this is about 2 people at the same time. Kind of the same situation with both. I mean I`m all about not ruinin` friendships. But I hate when that`s the only excuse you have for not wantin` to give things a try and see if more than "friends" is possible. In one case, I think it`s more of a case of not bein` faithful and somethin` happenin` along the way on her part that might ruin shit. But if that`s the case just come out and say it lol. And the other situation I don`t know what to think. She don`t seem like the type of person to get in a relationship and do somethin` to mess it up. But she keeps tossin` that "I don`t wanna ruin our friendship" thing at me. I don`t see her reasonin` because she`s the type of person that I can`t think of anythin` that would come up to mess things up. But I guess she thinks it`s possible, so I can`t really hate on this. But it`s somethin` I never fully understood. I`m the type of dude that would rather try and be with someone that I`m close friends with. Cuz then I already know a lot about you. I think it gives the relationship a better chance as opposed to jumpin` into a relationship with someone brand new. But maybe that`s just me. Feel free to lemme know what you women think about this.

Ok. I`ll stop at this for now. These are the biggest 2 things that irk me at the moment. Any of you women that actually read this and have any input feel free to comment. Am I wrong about the findin` time situation or do y`all agree with me and was movin` on the best thing to do? And why do you women seem to frown on tryin` to give a relationship with a chance someone that you`ve know for some years? Is knowin` somebody actually a bad thing when it comes to tryin` to see if things can be taken past more than just friends? Fill me in on these...

Lately...

2010-01-17T20:48:00.000-05:00

I haven`t been in a depressed mood lately. Haven`t really changed that much. Just got out of a certain situation that was startin` to take a bigger toll on me. Since then I been uplifted. Woulda never thought that just steppin` away from somethin` that I wanted to be a part of would do as much good for me as it did. Besides that I`ve been learnin` how to express myself more instead of just keepin` everythin` to myself because I think nobody will understand what I`m tryna say. It just happens that people actually understand me for the most part. At least what I wanna let them understand lol. I`d be lyin` if I said that I don`t like this new found happy feelin`. Guess I`m takin` some strides in the right way of makin` sure that I`m happy. Now I just gotta keep it goin` so I don`t fall back into the same repetitive cycle!

So We Had A Show Last Night...

2010-01-17T17:49:00.000-05:00

And I found myself gettin` aggravated tryin` to get the crowd involved more than they were. And I don`t thnk we had a bad set at all. But it`s cool. That`s just somethin` I need to work on instead of gettin` aggravated about it. But on another note. A LOT of people did come up to me and show love after we got off stage so that was cool. HW and the Scribblenauts did they thing on stage. L.G. did his thing for the ladies with a Reggae set. Young Riot and Amalgam Digital came down to show love. That was dope. TCF murdered it on stage like usual. I think Ima rob y`all idea about spittin` acapella verses lol. THE LAST EMPEROR! WOOOOOOOOO. That`s what Ima say about him. A hip hop legend. And he rocked the stage like he still has the same hunger he did from day one. The crowd was pretty big. A lotta people came out. Hip Hop was definitely in the buildin`. State Of The Art. Swift Characters. B-Boys were doin` they thing all night. DJ Corleone was holdin` it down on the 1s and 2s. Bartendars were servin` some good ass drinks lol. That was a plus for me. I got some pretty good footage of the whole night. I`ll be editin` it and gettin` it up sooner or later for anyone that`s interested in checkin` it out. Check back soon to see if I have the videos up yet! PEACE!

Under The Bridge

2010-01-13T01:57:00.000-05:00

Somethin` I wrote on Monday....

I don`t ever wanna feel... Like I did that day
Take me to the place I love... Take me all the way

With heart on sleeve, my crooked tie still resembles a noosed neck
That I could barely fix straight... just imagine my loose ends
I try to mold reality out these lies that the truth bends
While payin` attention to you has got me nothin` but new debts
I can`t afford to pay off, I just watch as they build up
This table for 2 is half full with regrets, but we`re still "us"
Or so I like the still believe, cause the endin` is not clear
The illusion is beautiful, but you expect me to not stare?
Not as easy as it seems, still haven`t threaded the needle
It`s like tryna stitch together 2 halves that aren`t equal
So things taste more bitter, a little harder to digest
Sheddin` a part of what you left cause you thought it was for best
And I`ve bargained what I kept with hopes we could be "more"
But this natural high always lands every time we see shore
So toss the anchor, we`ll wait a day and set sail tomorrow
As I come to terms with your heart, the one I failed to borrow

I don`t ever wanna feel... Like I did that day
Take me to the place I love... Take me all the way

With heart on sleeve, I gave up matchin` my shirt with new pants
I would`ve poured my heart, if only you`d cup your 2 hands
Tired of the need to feel loved, cause the longer I sit waitin`
Is the more I grow numb, which isn`t part of the sensation
But I stuck around long enough, time to seek me a new end
While you try to take credit for ruinin` 2 friends
That could`ve been leaps more had you just opened your eyes
Instead you rained on my parade, plagued with gray and sore skies
But this umbrella ain`t big enough for the both of us
So watch me head for clear skies while you open up
This boat has roughed through storms but watch as the bow breaks
Cause you granted me the freedom I believe that I`ll now take
And sail that way with, feelin` alone is what I`ll happily be
Mainly because I`m tired of you sittin` in my passenger seat
Though the pain might sting at first, it`s just a part of what`s lost
Inflate your ego, stand tall, I hope this bridge is knockin` you off

I don`t ever wanna feel... Like I did that day
Take me to the place I love... Take me all the way

On My Way Up...

2010-01-12T20:45:00.001-05:00

Somethin` I wrote last February...

On my way up I saw...

Friends become enemies, over bottles of Hennessey
Enemies turn to friends, over bottles of Gin
Then friends become lovers, cause they didn`t use a rubber
Or lovers that hate eachother, cause one met a perfect 10
Then perfect became imperfect, kept to self and felt deserted
Insecure, it made her nervous, now she`s pullin` the pin
Then pens write good byes, suicide notes and cries
Cuz no matter what he tried, she fell in love with his friend
I seen murderers rape and kill, over crooked drug deals
Thinkin` a hundred dollar bill, was worth your next of kin
Then innocent bystanders, catch bullets in front of cameras
When asked why, we would answer: Cuz Jihad is a sin
Then planes fly into towers, guided by a higher power
Sharin` similar traits to ours, it`s all part of the end
Then endings became the start of depression, creatin` art
Painted over a breakin` heart, cause we`re too prideful to bend

On my way up I saw...

Smiles turn into cries, the truth turn into lies
As ears become our eyes, to see the silence within
Then silence turn into pain, as anger re-lit the flame
Knowin` they`re both the same, we still try to pretend
Then daughters without a mother, to tuck `em under the covers
And let her know that they love her, whenever she needs a friend
Then sons without a father, deadbeat or didn`t bother
That made it a lot harder, still they grew into men
Then children give birth to child, before they even learned to smile
Then sit and wait a while, just to do it again
Then people show interest in, this black man in the election
No longer was it a question, cuz Obama will win!
I`ve also seen beautiful things, like freedom and birds sing
Oppurtunity knock AND RING, but I`ll save that for when
Cause really, how does it sound after ugly? Can`t make you proud
So I`m turnin` back around, I`m goin` to talk to him

...And let him know what I see on my way down

So with the New Year...

2010-01-09T19:06:00.000-05:00

I`ve decided there`s quite a few things I can do to better myself on the path of anythin` but failure lol. Shit I`ll even be happy with semi success compared to where I`m at right now. So I`m gonna see if I can put these in a list and explain a little about what I mean with each of them. Here we go... Bare with me...

1. "Me" comes first.
This is prolly gonna be my hardest task lol. And I don`t mean this in a dick head way either. But I`m a nigga with a big heart. I tend to put other people before myself A LOT. Usually too often. And I think it`s one of the biggest things I need to change. What I mean by this is makin` sure that I`m happy first and other people second. NOT sayin` that makin` me happy is all I care about. But I`m not gonna go out on a limb to make other people happy if it has the opposite effect on me. Which shouldn`t be hard because I keep a close knit group of people I keep myself around. And most of them are good friends and what not. So it should be easy to make sure I keep myself on an equal playin` ground as I keep them on when it comes to this.

2. "Fuck what you think."
Yea that`s right! I`m gettin` hardcore with this shit! Lol nosa. But word. I don`t need to get nobody`s "ok". And even though I`ve told myself that I`ve been that way. There`s been times when I still wanted/or thought I needed someone else`s approval. I`m over that now. This usually brings me back to number one where I end up tryin` to make other people happy and not makin` sure I`m ok with the situation as well. So they kinda both go hand in hand.

3. "If I don`t get it done, wtf am I even tryin` for?"
What I mean by this is that if I start out sayin` I`m gonna do somethin`, I need to follow through and make sure I finish it. Too often I just give up on shit or change my mind. Which also leads to me thinkin` things out more, so I needa make sure what I say I`m gonna do is somethin` I actually need to do and plan on finishin`. No more startin` stuff and just losin` interest or not makin` sure I see an end result. That hasn`t got me anywhere.

4. Be HAPPY
This is gonna be a hard one. Though I might hide it in person pretty good. I get depressed quite a damn bit. Usually it`s a hard thing to get through because somethin` new will add on to whatever was originally botherin` before I get through it. So it`s sorta like a downhill spiral of the same shit over and over. And I`m the type of person to keep my problems to myself for the most part unless I put it into my music. So I know that doesn`t help. But what I`m aimin` for with this is to try to stay away from things that might get me into the same usual shit where I get in my depressed stages.

5. Make Improvements
Pretty much. By the end of the year. I want to be in a better position than where I`m at now. Physically. Emotionally. Financially. Musically. Etc. I not sayin` by leaps and bounds. But I want to be able to see a difference. And HOPEFULLY a change for the better and not the worst. This is gonna take a lot of effort. But I`m ready for it. I`m tired of bein` in a hole. And I`m not gonna depend on nobody else to try and help dig me out. First step of gettin` where you wanna be is goin` for wherever that is full force. Only person that can hold yourself back is you. And I`m a firm believer of that. So I plan to make some changes and do what I need to do to see that this happens.

Ok ok ok. Not that big of a list. But I narrowed it down to things that I think will have the biggest impact on myself and help me become a better person as a whole. Some of you might not agree with this. But it`s what I think is best for me. Might not be 100% correct with all this. But we as people learn through mistakes. Trial and error is the best teacher. And with that said. It`s time to put these in motion.

Hmmm. Might use this over that "Say Somethin" beat....

2010-01-04T17:25:00.001-05:00

Why can`t my problems remain basic, gotta learn to face it
Both planted these flowers, I`m not feelin` the arrangements
Thought shit would be good cuz how long we done been acquainted
The picture that we painted gettin` tainted, keep hearin` my heart
It`s yellin` "leave!", but still convince it to try and stay
But what`s the point if you ain`t givin` the time of day?
Feel I should pack up and move back into my hide-a-way
I`m losin` sight, but the feelin` still grows inside of me
Hard to explain, but lately the vibe you givin` me
Seem like I`m talkin` to myself, and you`re not listening
And honestly ain`t a part of this verse that isn`t me
The liquor can`t erase these thoughts out of my memory
I used to feel I could see our path cross vividly
Now the flame is off, pot`s not simmering
I`ve stopped givin` you the whole hundred percent of me
Don`t mean I`d take it back but...

Without music....

2010-01-04T00:07:00.000-05:00

I swear I think I`d be lost lol. I mean. I can`t be completely sure. I`m pretty sure if music was never introduced to us as a form of entertainment, I`m pretty sure I would find somethin` else to substitute for it. But in this day and age. Music is my escape. And I`m not just talkin` about makin` music. But just listenin` to music is like a luxury. It helps me get through A LOT of shit on a daily basis. it helps me be able to cope with current/past problems that pop up and try to rain on my happy parades. Or it just helps me vibe out and relax when the time is needed. Or on the other hand get hyped and bug out lol. Lately it`s been more of gettin` through the rainy days though. Not sayin` I`m the only one that has them. Or the only one that depends on music to help me get through shit. But it does play a major part in my life. And I actually sat down and thought about how dependent I am on music. It`s funny. But I think I`d go on a crazy trip without it. I`d lose my sanity or somethin` lol. Well music. And liquor. Lol. Those that know me know the truth in that statement. But at least with music around I won`t become so dependent on liquor that I`ll need some AA meetin`s anytime soon lol.

Ever Been A Part Of Somethin` Bigger Than Yourself?...

2009-12-26T18:41:00.000-05:00

Was watchin` the Temptations movie the other day and that line stood out to me. It`s deep if you look at it and actually think about it. Like us as humans are some complex ass people lol. Just a single person is complex. There`s many different parts and pieces to each and everyone of us. Like we`re all our own puzzle. But on top of that, even if we could complete ourselves and put the final piece down, then we only just start to become a single piece in a much larger puzzle. And even though that`s the case, it`s hard to think that I can fit in with a larger scheme. I`m the typa cat that likes to keep my distance because when I don`t I usually end up regrettin` it. I might have lost y`all with that, but go back and re-read it. I`m sure it makes a little sense at least lol.

So the Holidays are here huh? One of `em just passed us by. Now it`s time to bring in the new year. That`s somethin` to be excited about. I hope y`all stick to your resolutions and do your best to get accomplished whatever you`re settin` ahead of you. I got a lot of tightenin` up to do myself. And the only thing that`s gonna hold me back is me, no matter how much I try to lay the blame on someone or somethin` else.

Hope all of you had a good Christmas. Spent time with your family, friends and loved ones. That`s what should be important on these holidays. Not presents or bein` disappointed because you didn`t get what you wanted. I got to spend time with my fam that`s around. And that`s what matters. For those of you I couldn`t see, hope everythin` went good for y`all. But really I couldn`t ask for more. I mean there`s a few things that I could ask for, but I won`t get into that right now. I`ll save the depressive stuff for another blog lol. But on that note, hope y`all have a good time bringin` in the new year if I don`t drop by here before then. Until next time you jerks...

Life`s Full Of Ups and Downs...

2009-12-08T17:32:00.000-05:00

... but what`s funny is when I think that I`m up is when I feel the most down. I`m a fucked up individual like that I guess lol. It`s a weird thing to try and explain. It`s an even weirder thing to try and come to terms with. But what don`t kill you, makes you stronger. Like you haven`t heard that sayin` before. Tsk tsk Nah. Be original already. Anyway what`s up to whoever reads the bullshit I be writin` on here. I doubt anybody does lol. I more do this for myself. Helps me vent. Makes me feel better at the end of the day. And to prove it. I haven`t wrote anythin` on here in a looooong ass time. And I am now. Already feelin` better than I was lol. I need some help. Seriously, I think I do lol. Nah, I`m lyin`. I`m perfectly fine. Sexy even. But I`m tryna reach that "beautiful" level. Bein` sexy or fine is good and all. But it`s not too fulfilling. I need somethin` more. But at the same time I feel like I have everythin` I need. For the time bein`. Not that I`m tryna complain or anythin`. I just come off that way a lot. Can`t help it, sue me. I`m so dyin` to get away from this place again. My bad moods/depression have only gotten worse since I last talked about not wantin` to be here anymore lol. I really think I am an emo ass muh fucka. At least a semi emo ass muh fucka lol. I know how to hid my feelin`s pretty good so it prolly doesn`t show on a day to day basis. Couple of things have been botherin` the past few weeks. Around the time that my pops died so that`s been on my mind. The little one been workin` a lot so ain`t been able to see her much. Bills and not havin` money been a killer lately. And everythin` happenin` in sync with each other just makes for a shitty mood/depressed me. But it ain`t like I ain`t been here before. I`ll be aight. But aight you jerks. I`m outta here. I`ll hopefully be tunin` in more often. Dunno why I stopped updatin` this thing. Until next time you beautiful people...

The Male Species Is An Incurable Disease.

2009-10-03T21:23:00.002-04:00

Another fold-in collab with Vince.

Seriously, I think beauty is a low sugar confection. Yeah, obviously its good to be a dreamy doo-wop. And say "Baby your beautiful nothings and everythings". Saying that seriously relates to being an outcast. Unless I'm trying to be Big Boi or Andre 3000. Oppurtunities for one-nighters start and zoom off. We've done it all if you consider space a space-form. Then you will eventually think of trees and degrees. Being apart of the male species is an incurable disease. You can't believe I'm waiting to know whats up. After awhile it becomes redundant in between fluxing. You can hear an echo in the back of your coin jar. Over and over and over and over where no uterus has ever been. But what if it felt like what we have is ingenius for starters. Starting to become a beginning, playing with words. The same as it did in your heart-shaped box 4 weeks ago. FREEDOM BE YOURS!

Or whatever it takes for you to go party and throw fits. What I'm trying to get across humans could never wear. But even keeping that in mind, "Everyone out of this room!". You are truly beautiful, even outside my door. Who are you yet?, for now I know all your made of. Waiting for you to walk in affiliating with shaving cream. Or for me to get drunk and be one with the rascal. Waiting to take that 1st step and realize your confession.

Fermented Abomination

2009-09-29T21:57:00.002-04:00

I remember being young at the ripe age of 100. Monsters in the closet matter only if I wore clothes. Under the bed I hid out of sheer joy. That, they just might find commonplace. Even though I had never sat with gentlemen. But Saw is on its 5th Irish on st. Patricks. I stopped watching after the dirty rug debacle. Honesty really isn't much in porch gossip. And honestly I couldn't hear you over the nights downpour. With that in mind, I often lie in hells winter. Filling it with imaginary stars is gonna help. Each star to form a truth or ressurect a spirit. But the truth hasn't met our abysmal little galaxy. Siegals album was sweet-nothings at the symposium. Actually it didnt even mean. This room can't fit us both. I was never really a fan of politicians or dancers. AC's are the only things making me waltz in my throneclothes.

And I'm not close to being falsetto who cares. But I wouldn't mind staring in living rooms. Look the opposite way if a black cat fucks up this arrangement. Minus my yesterdays and their strangeness. Tommorows to me rhymes with a body of work. And truthfully I'm tired, quite a paradox. Still waiting on something to drum to huh? Not that I'ma sheer poet to Jim Morrison poems. I have remote control but I only see my flaws. That I can call home without painted claws. No up at bat. No pitcher. No goals that Americans set. But I love playing the field and making you wet. When you get somewhere, the listeners do most the speaking.

Swing For The Fences

2009-09-29T02:56:00.004-04:00

A fold-in piece I collab'd with my boy Vince (http://www.myspace.com/slomotion52588) on. He's a dope writer. Check his stuff out. If you know what a "fold-in" piece is, then you'll know what I'm talkin' about lol.

I heard Jim and Jack are with me on a barstool. They both treat me the same again and again. After two shots each please just shoot me down. I start to get a nice high and go, SWOOSH!. That is usually when I talk about the Bush administration. Hate. A strong word, a miracle of saturation. Well needless to say my feelings are absolutely amazing. Overtime I guess they're my starry night ablazing. I'm not a fan of Kanye and I dont dream of Siegal. His music is a story of stupidity and immense growth. But usually hes a egotist munching manna loaf. Or a torn soul depending on your governments control. I've seen it both ways inside a very steep hole. Depending on my mood we both grow up and breathe. I'm not the type of person to make you roll-up a sleeve. Never knew anyone named Judy could down all this vodka. But if you do meet someone before its all over with. SWING FOR THE FENCES.

This story is gonna begin with jack brothers, well fuck it. And end with alcohol poisining the same. I wish someone would join me for a few beers. Around this time the YMCA has a nice buzz going on. And freeworld leaders beg me to stop hating her. Now I'm waiting on a deluxe miracle right. You are pretty normal and feelings for her were far from week. Van gogh is to blame for the setting growing stronger. Hotter than the Nevada desert but I hate Kanye though. I dream of Sinatra and stupidity and thats okay at times. I'll chop down a tree of life for you egotistical bastard. I am a minion and I seek how you look at it. Yes. Now is the time we are pretty much the same. The blue-collar deathwish is making me a person to judge. Pull up a chair and drink a drink named Judy. Make a man out of me with that name. And I'll be sure to swing for the fences.

Might not hit a homerun but only a few run deep. Usually the bitches I meet keep me restless. So they're pretty much at one with their new identity. Not wearing any jeans during human contact. But I hear its My genes, Your panic room. Am. AM, like you can't ignore your manic doom. And just call me a Pro as if you DO KNOW ME. On the other hand, the one that knew me choked on blood. A cover up to hide you being placed in the guillotine. Deep inside hoping the one I knew best won't tell it. The trap door lingers, can you smell it. With hopes I will keep the amnesia of ambrosia. Yes. Thats what rips a smile to a million bits. So with that in mind I take everything you feel. And hope the flavor is already dead or soon killed. Sort of like leftover soups-the meaning of meaninglessness. It always taste best with a deck of shuffled tarot cards. WHY IS THAT?.

Seven Pounds...

2009-09-25T03:28:00.001-04:00

He stood there starin` at what he`d just done
No longer feelin` like it was all against one
In a mist of blood, smoke & ash, the aftermath
Replayed his memories, seein` a flash of the past
He laughed tryna grasp the full effect of victory
Over a world that always seemed like it wasn`t listening
Skipped a beat, heart pacin`, he began to walk, racin`
Toward where? He didn`t know, as he stared in amazement
Had he known a month ago he would be capable of this
The plan was flawless, he thought as he escaped without a risk
Of bein` caught, slowin` down as he began to realize
That nobody would catch him because nobody survived
Slowin` his jog to a walk, he looked behind him and smiled
Maybe this was his destiny that`s been engraved since a child
A slave to denial, never sided with thoughts of impossible
His only enemy was himself and that wasn`t an obstacle
He couldn`t tackle, leanin` down starin` closely at his shadow
Made the step from "boy" to "man", this made him an adult
Breakin` free of the burdens that often paved him in shackles
Holdin` in his firm grip somethin` that made "them" all cattle
But he was far from a shepard, more like a wolf on the hunt
Feelin` the pride growin` inside just from lookin` at such
A disaster, just to know he held other`s life at his will
Proud that he didn`t hesitate when it was time for the kill
Knowin` he murdered sons, fathers, even mothers and daughters
Still not as much of an honor as becomin` a martyr
Bothered by the thought of it not bein` certain or fate
He walked away thinkin`, "the 72 virgins can wait"
For now there was a greater good that he could strive for
The Jihad, and he was willin` to spend his life at war
"A terrorist" standin` with the pride of a "hero" around him
Born 23 years ago, some where, seven pounds, zero ounces

Hopeless Romantics

2009-09-25T03:27:00.001-04:00

Hopeless Romantics

Rock
From what she heard, love wasn`t anything more than a word
"The nerve.." she replied to the denies of what her heart has deserved
Since birth, part of her yearned for the perfect companion
Belief that he existed grew to fuel her search for romantics
Hopeful, not hopeless - she hoped that the road back
Would be all she imagined it would, so she laughed as she looked
Continuously, non stop knowing her faith wouldn`t shatter
Turned backs on nay sayers to turn into the face of "what mattered"
Embracing their laughter, thought to herself "they will cry later"
Wiping away the tears, her foundation in faith couldn`t be greater

Paper
Writing her vows, she sat excited with a smile on her face
Happily in love, proud that she found someone to light up her day
Even if it wasn`t rained upon, she coudln`t deny that the sight of
His embrace would take her sunny skies and just make them brighter
Honey mooners hand in hand, they danced and enjoyed the night
Knowing this time would finally come, she knew the choice was right
In the hotel room, candles lit with music in the distance
She sat in bed, patiently waiting she was clueless of what`s missin`
Wondering what was keeping him, anxious for him to come and take her
Reaching over to answer the phone she seen a letter and divorce papers

Heartbreak
From what she heard, love wasn`t nothing but a word
"The nerve.." she replied after saying "somethings I don`t deserve"
Curled up in a ball, crying in the honey moon suite
Clueless to why this happened, hoping "someone will choose me"
She packed her things, switched the light off and closed the door
Depressed her clipped wings held her back, she was supposed to soar
Walked out of the elevator sulking as she headed for the exit
But stopped when a stranger grabbed her arm and said he had a message
"Will you have dinner with me? Just answer, no reason to write back."
She shook her head thinking to herself, "this time I`m on the right track"

Random drunk writin` lol

2009-09-25T03:26:00.001-04:00

When I drink, my mind tends to think on another level
Or is it just the fact that I tend to cover levels
Of Nahlidge, to keep you guessin` with no answer?
Or is it because a nigga gets brave enough to stand up?
And walk a little further, nervous, shakin` with my hands up
Or flyin` right above the runway... tryna land it
Handed a hand that handles life a little different
Puttin` my puzzle together, but notice pieces missin`
Livin` on a distant inch measurin` inches
Feathers and henchmen are often on the same lever as vision
So if it don`t make sense, then who am I to understand?
At bat, the waves knocked me off deck, I hope they underhand
A slow ball, toes crawl toward a seperate exit
Severin` sections of loneliness until I`m left with
A message of despair, so I stare until it`s clear
Like day, then I start findin` love in the things I fear

Look At The Mess You`ve Made

2009-09-25T03:25:00.002-04:00

If I said you were to blame, I`d be tellin` the truth
So put your neck on the line and I`ll sell you a noose
And make you feel small, from up here there`s a hell of a view
To watch me walk on your heart until the elephant`s loose
Then we can see him stampede, laugh, torture and shatter
You to pieces to the point that they won`t even add up
To a whole anymore, then I`ll stare as you dwindle
Into a worse version of me so you can see what I`ve been through
And contrary to what Wu said, shit`s never been simple
So those pre-fabricated make-ups, you can throw out the window
Or go stare into a mirror for somebody to vent to
Cause these excuses you come up with really makes me resent you
Tempt you? Don`t understand how you could warp and bend truth
And mend two lies together, guess you pursue what men do
Can`t difuse the stem due to all the built up of rage
Your glass is half full, while mine was filled up way
Before you decided to go off on your tantrums, I can`t stand `em
Everythin` planned is imperfect, we find perfect at random
And by "we", I mean that I`m the one standin` in the mirror
Through these cloudy grey skies that I`m stuck tryna clear up
Where my failures can only blame myself, so I`m in fear of
The final lap, cause when I`m down, it seems nobody hears us
But this bottle in my hand is often my escape to cheer up
And put a smile on, actin` like I don`t really care but
In reality I do, when the buzz starts to fade and hollow
But if today goes bad, we can always try the same tomorrow
Set backs when I`m sober, at times are too big a chase to swallow
So I often stare at life, wishin` that I could break and borrow
Yours for a day, but that just means a new set of problems
That you`re already accustomed to, with your own ways to solve `em
So I`ll just take my own back and try to work my way around
These road blocks, turnin` my uncharted highways into sacred ground
And realize my problems aren`t so bad when I sit and break `em down
Instead of tryin` to run, or be lazy and watch `em pilin` up
Deal with them as they approach, do my best to take apart
The wrong pieces, deal with the consequence with grains of salt
When it rains, don`t stall, just look at it as the NOW
And the WHEN you get through it thought should make you proud
What I`m tryna say is, YOU, yourself are your only real critics
So when you create your own monster, learn how to deal with it

Topic - "You can't create a monster and then whine when he stomps on a few buildings"

A Touch Of Paint

2009-09-25T03:24:00.002-04:00

Just a touch of paint will wash the rust away
Or at least hide it for a while `til my trust is saved
From the everyday things that try to crush my faith
Must I say... I`m tired of the dust that cakes
Buildin` layer over layer, makes the new seem old
Wearin` thin on the tires, but I choose these roads
Loose leafs hold the voice that makes the rooster crow
I usually don`t but feel like I should choose each goal
With a clear mind, undrugged and untoxicated
I`m a doctor`s patient abusin` all my doctor`s patience
I thought the waitin` would ruin, rot and drop my placement
Takin` me back to sqaure one, connect the dots, and faces
Become names that in time become another memory
Throwin` shots at happiness like, I love the misery
Symphony`s upon medleys of melodies meddling
On the brink of broken hearted, I sing when I`m close to heavenly
Settling near the front gate, it`s easy to choose hope
So when my happiness starts to peel all I need is a new coat

Reverse Home Sickness? Lol.

2009-09-22T23:16:00.000-04:00

Yea. So I was down in Florida for the 1st week of the month. Guess you can call it my first official vacation lol. And shit was CRAZY down there. Was stayin` in Miami and Hollywood. And didn`t wanna come back home for shit. Since I been back. I just been depressed lol. It`s weird. Like. Even when I wasn`t doin` shit down there, I was still havin` fun. I guess I just like the environment. It`s a whole different lifestyle that I could get used to. And I ain`t just talkin` about goin` clubbin` and shit all the time. My favorite thing down there was prolly just kickin` it on the beach durin` them late nights. Like I didn`t miss shit about this place while I was down there. And I`m missin` bein` down there since I came back. FUCK! lol. So yea. I seriously think I`m gonna consider movin` down there to live. That shit sounds like a dope ass idea. But I`m torn between weighin` my options of New York or Florida. I like both. But right now Florida is takin` the cake. But I guess we`ll see. I just know I NEED to get the fuck outta this hole lol. This shit is just like a downward spiral of depression and boredom bein` back home. But aight I`m done bitchin` about it until next time bitches.

Last One Before We Hit The Road...

2009-08-28T22:48:00.000-04:00

Had a few beers. Toasted a shot for the road. Shit`s all ready. Tossin` the bags in the van. `bout to be on our way to Miami. Makin` a pit stop in North Carolina to visit the cousin. And then "I`m goin` to Miami.... Welcome to Miami" lol. But word. It feels DOPE to finally be gettin` outta this wack ass city for a while. I get to go down there and bug the fuck out without anybody knowin` who the fuck I am. Shit just feels good to get away. Gonna have to make a few fans down there while I`m at it. Idk how they gonna respond to what I rap about though. All they know about is beach life and partyin` lol. Shit. I WANNA KNOW ABOUT THAT SHIT TOO! lol. But word. Might have to update y`all with a few of these while I`m down there. But the chance is slim right now so I`m not makin` any promises. But until next time you freaks....

Sometimes You Just Need Somethin` New...

2009-08-26T23:06:00.002-04:00

...word. Shit happens to get old and stale a lot. To me anyway. And I`ve been cursed with the want to keep beatin` a dead horse. I needa quit that shit. When things ain`t what you was expectin` goin` in, just keep it movin`. I know they say "things are more rewardin` when you work hard for it". I agree to an extent. BUT at the same time. SOME things definitely aren`t worth the effort, seriously. So I mean the effort you put into somethin` depends on how bad you want it. And I`m the type of person that`ll just say "fuck it" if I feel like I`m runnin` on a tread mill down a dead end. But even knowin` that about myself. I still don`t tend to act on it all the time lol. And this blog is the result of that. And the meanin` behind it is women. Lol. Surprise, surprise. Bet you had no idea right???? Lol. And it ain`t like I`m just talkin` about some "oh, shorty won`t give me no ass yet, it`s been 2 WHOLE days". LMAO. I`m talkin` like long amounts of time. That feel are just bein` wasted because of my stubborness to think that it will happen eventually. Uggh. What the fuck`s wrong with me? I need a drink lol. Until next time you muh fluckers...

So Wrote This DOPE Verse Today

2009-08-20T01:40:00.002-04:00

Decided to stop holdin` back and just open up again with my words. And it`s gotta be one of my favorite verses in a loooooong ass time. I touched on a LOT of shit that`s been urkin` me lately. From women. To myself. I`m a fan of it. Some of you might be if you actually listen to it when it`s recorded. I think my nigga Ha`Rizon is gonna drop a verse on it too. And I might ask my boy Brandon Heat to hop on it too. Either way. If I get ONE of them on it, you KNOW it`s gonna be crack. Both of them niggas is crazy with the rhymes.

But on some other shit. How y`all been? I mean a nigga been aight. Could be better. But could be worse too. So I`m not gonna complain. And even if I did. Ain`t nobody gonna listen to my complaints. Been tryna plan this trip to Florida in 2 weeks. Time`s countin` down. But this shit NEEDS TO HAPPEN. I know I didn`t take a week off to stay in Fall River. FUCK THAT! I`m tryna go down there and bug out for a week. NO WORRIES. GETTIN` DRUNK. A DIFFERENT ENVIRONMENT. Shit sounds good to me. I`m ALL game for that. TruthSauce.

But aight. I`m done. Don`t got much I wanna blog about right now besides that. So... Until next time you fucks. PEACE!

Liquor & Slow Jams

2009-08-14T00:13:00.002-04:00

Why do these 2 things go together so perfectly? lol. Real talk. I can be gettin` tipsy, listenin` to rap, rock, country music or whatever. Then I`ll toss a slow jam on and then I`m stuck on slow jams for the REST of the night until I`m ready to pass out. lol. Bumpin` that new Maxwell single right now. That shit is the TRUTH. If you don`t agree, you need to go somewhere with yourself. This shit`s gonna be on repeat for about a half hour. Maybe more lol. But when I decide to change the song. I got A LOT of other options to move on to. But yea. Just wanted to let you know. Liquor and bein` drunk makes you appreciate these slow, love, moody songs a lot more. HALWER!

I`m Goin` Goin`, Back Back Back....

2009-07-27T01:05:00.002-04:00

Lol most likely nah I`m not. But word. I ain`t lived in Boston for like 14 years now. But EVERY time I go back. It still feels like home. Why the fuck is that? lol. Bein` out there just gives me a dope vibe that I don`t get anywhere else. It just feels like "this is where I should be". Corny as that might sound. *does the Hi Hater wave*.

But on some other shit. The plan is to move to New York in about a year. Me and my dude Ha` Rizon had a talk a few weeks back and he convinced me to make that shit happen. Bein` out here ain`t doin` me no good. I need somethin` new and different. And New York sounds like a good idea all things considered. I love the city life. And NY is "the city that never sleeps". How can I go wrong?

Had a talk with my boy Marshall a little bit ago. Shit kinda gave me faith that he might try to get back down with the label. We`ll see if that ends up happenin`. I personally think that nigga needs to come back home. It`s just a matter of other niggas thinkin` the same shit.

But that`s it. It`s a wrap. I`m finito. Ima finish this cup of Vodka I got in front of me. Maybe pour me another one after it`s done. Until the next time fuckers...

So, like, ummmm.....

2009-07-22T02:30:00.003-04:00

What do you do now? Things don`t go accordin` to plan. So what you well wishin` ass muh fucka. Shit happens. You gotta learn to deal with it (note to self). Word. I agree, but shit is madddd wack sauce! lol. But oh well. There`s only so much you can do until the cards are laid out on the table, if that makes sense. After that. You gotta just hope you got the better hand. If not. Take your loss like a man and move on to the next game. But games get tirin`. So what are you supposed to do now? (question to self) Ummm. Idk. Just go with the flow I guess. Let the pieces fall in place. And try to figure out the outcome at least a few steps ahead of the finale. I don`t like them 2 hour premiere/endin` shits. Unless we talkin` liquor. If liquor`s involved then fuck it, curtains. Drum roll. Round of applause, because the anxiety has been buildin` up for a while. If no liquor`s involved. Anybody wanna buy my ticket? *cough* I`m sick, and I don`t think I can make it to the show. Matter a fact. You can have my ticket for free.

Blah. That shit made sense to me. Specially the way I`m feelin` right now. Some of you might be able to get the jist of what I`m gettin` at. Some of you won`t. But I`m goin` to bed. Until next time...

Make Music... Don`t Force It...

2009-07-21T13:55:00.003-04:00

Word. I learned that the hard way over the years. Best way to get back in your groove is just drop whatever you`re stuck on and move onto somethin` else. If the song you were workin` on before is meant to be, it`ll come back to you. If not. Fuck it. Just write write write write. And have fun. Don`t take shit too serious. I was doin` this for a while. Thinkin` "oh, I don`t think people will feel my shit unless I`m doin` this or that." Fuck it. Just be yourself. Make music for you, then music for "them" will come. I been writin` A LOT lately. Haven`t really been in the studio. But I got a lot of shit ready to be laid down. Got a few projects that I`m tryna get crackin` soon. One is gonna be a free mixtape over all industry/other artist`s beats. The writin` process for that is about half way done. Then after that I wanna drop an E.P. Somethin` like 7-10 tracks. Get the feel of puttin` an album together before I start workin` on recordin` A Reason For Everything. I think that`s the title Ima stick with for my first full length solo album That might end up changin` but we`ll see. I still needa work on gettin` on a few tracks for T.C.F.`s upcomin` project. Been talkin` to the other 2 Life Sentence members about puttin` out a project after like 4 years lol. We`ll see what happens. But let`s just say I might seem like I`m asleep right now. But there`s a lotta behind the scenes arrangin` and discussin` that`s goin` on right now. I`ll fill y`all in with the updates as they happen.

www.twitter.com/nahlidge
www.myspace.com/nahlidge508

A Reason For Everything.

Rock The Bells

2009-07-19T19:03:00.002-04:00

With events like Rock The Bells gettin` put together, it`s safe to say Hip Hop won`t die anytime soon. My 3rd year goin` in a row. And I gotta say that it was the best one so far. The fun started after watchin` Mickey Factz set. He straight killed it. I was a fan of dude before seein` him. But him live is crazy. Walkin` around peepin` all the tents and gettin` to talk to all the muh fucka`s in them in between sets is cool. $9 for a beer is NOT cool lol. $4 for a 16 oz bottle of water. Also NOT cool. But fuck it. Termanology was there kickin` it. Dope to see other local artists there. But I didn`t go as an artist this year. Well, I rocked my Backwards Productions shirt. But I didn`t try pushin` any cd`s or nothin`. Just wanted to have fun and enjoy all the rapper`s sets. The best set hands down was Nas and Damian Marley. They straight rocked the stage for about an hour and a half. Definitely got a nigga in a trance. Nas performin` One Mic is definitely a must see. Damian Marley performin` ANYTHIN` is definitely a must see. Nas AND Damian Marley on stage together performin` Road To Zion and songs off of the album they doin` together. Another MUST SEE. But enough about them. My second favorite set goes to Common. The energy that dude has is unbelievable. He definitely rocked the stage. Had a live band with him too. Shit was dopeeeeeeeeeeeee. The Roots also did they thing. My first time seein` them live. Definitely wouldn`t mind seein` any of the people I`ve already mentioned again. Besides them. The other set I was hyped about seein` was Slaughterhouse. And I was upset after the end of they set, because I wanted to see them keep rockin` the stage lol. They definitely got dope chemistry live. And to see 4 of the dopest rappers out right now. Live, at the same time. Together. Can`t go wrong. Evidence and Alchemist was dope. BUCKSHOT & KRS ONE! WHAT?!?!?!?! They was crazy. Tech N9ne`s set was DOPE. Him, Krizz and Kalhoun just went up on stage and had fun. That`s another set I was hyped about. Then chillin` at the tent afterwards talkin` to them, they mad cool. I wanna see them rock at a smaller venue. Reflection Eternal. Pete Rock. Big Boi. Raekwon. Slum Village. To name some others that were there. How could you go wrong showin` up for the day? Hip Hop is alive and well people. Already lookin` forward to next year. Hopefully I get to peep the show in New York though.

The Best Things In Life Are Free.....

2009-07-16T23:30:00.002-04:00

Been a while since I could do this little blog thing. And hasn`t much happened since the last time lol. I`m on the phone with a short person right now while I`m typin` this, so bare with me. How y`all been? I been aight. Can`t complain about much. Been drinkin` less. But Ima start makin` up for that soon. Believe me lol. On another tip. I been startin` to get lonely livin` this single life lol. I was lovin` it for a while. Maybe it`s cuz I been sober though lol. So when I start drinkin` on the regular again I`ll be good. We`ll find out either way. Haven`t been in the studio for a while. Been writin` A LOT of shit though. So when I get back in the studio I`m gonna have MADDDD shit to lay down. I don`t even know what else to type right now. So Ima end it short lol. But word @ the title of this blog. HOLLA!

WTFFFFF @ PEOPLE????

2009-06-01T01:14:00.003-04:00

Ugh. Writin' 2 blogs about the same person in a row is corny. So my disclaimer. THIS IS NOT ABOUT THE SAME PERSON THAT MY LAST BLOG WAS ABOUT. lol. But word. I don`t understand certain people. Seriously. It`s like. No matter what kinda difference you try to make it don`t even matter. It`s quittin` timeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I`m clockin` out and givin` my 2 week notice.

But on another note. These MTV movie awards is some shit huh. WTF @ how many awards this Twilight flick won. Damn. Shit`s crazy. I`m still waitin` to see what flick wins the best movie. If it`s this Twilight shit Ima bug. Dark Knight all day. Will Ferrell is a nut lol.

That`s it. Bye.

I Wanna Go Outsideeeeee.. In The Rainnnnnn...

2009-05-17T02:09:00.002-04:00

Nobody told you to try to find the end of that rainbow. U can only blame yourself for gettin` lost. Even when someone was willin` to try and find you, you didn`t wanna be found. There`s only so much one person can do. Only so much they`re willin` to put up with. After a while we give up. But then it`s OUR fault right? Yea sure, if you say so. These little Cupid games are only fun for so long. After a while I don`t feel like playin` anymore. So it`s either take it to the next level or just move on. "Move on" seems to be more like what I`ve had to do lately. But eh, things don`t always go as planned so I shouldn`t be complainin`. It`s just one of those days I guess. Things start to get to me. I start to get tired of dealin` with bullshit. But it`s "live and learn" right?

Music Is My Life

2009-05-13T13:39:00.000-04:00

Or at least it`s startin` to feel that way finally lol. Been a productive couple of nights in the studio these past 2 days. Now I just gotta keep it rollin`. Bein` in the booth is a good way to let off some steam and get my mind clear. It`s either that or stick to weed and liquor every night. I prefer makin` beautiful music. Maybe ugly music sometimes, but fuck it lol. My job cuttin` back on my hours. So I`m gettin` a lotta free time. Not necessarily a good thing when it comes to money. But hopefully it`ll work out for the better. Gives me a lot more time to write and record. Before these last 2 weeks I felt like I was slackin` on my music. Not a good thing at all. Feels dope to get back in the groove of things. Good looks to Backwards and the squad comin` through on the late nights for the studio sessions. I haven`t drank since last Friday! And it ain`t even been hard not to do. All it takes is bein` broke so I can`t go to the store to buy any liquor lol. But yea, I think it`s definitely time to cut down on the drinkin` anyway. Shit was gettin` serious for a while. A nigga need to cool out. Ima 24 this year. And it feels like I haven`t accomplished much in life yet. My boy K.C. just brought that to my attetntion last night. Pac was 25 when he died. That`s only 2 years older than I am. And look at everythin` that fucker did in his short time. I need to get on the fuckin` ball. It ain`t time to procrastinate on shit like "oh, that can wait". Nah, fuck that. The time is now or never. That`s the mind frame I have to be in. If not, then Ima just be a regular day job havin` nigga my whole life. I ain`t tryna do that. I`m tryna get further than that. And it`ll only be my fault if I don`t. I can`t blame anybody else for holdin` me back. Well I mean I can, but that`s just me tryna blame some else besides self. That`s the bitch way out. But I`m done ramblin` for now. Got a few things I needa do, so Ima get those out the way. Not sure what the days gonna bring after that yet. But we`ll find out. Peace.

Boredom is a curse.

2009-04-21T21:20:00.000-04:00

What`s the deal. I never really got into this bloggin` shit. But I`m bored at work right now with nothin` better to do. So I figured I`d make one of these bad boys.

For starters it`s rainy as shit outside. I`m stuck at work `til 11:30ish. Got an untouched bottle of liquor waitin` for me when I get out. Haven`t been able to work on music for a while with us movin` the studio and havin` to get the booth built.

But on a different page. Got some dope footage that I`m gonna be editin` tonight. Possible uploadin` 2morrow. dunno yet. You can check the old vids out at www.youtube.com/nahlidge508. Show me some love on there.

You can also check out the music on MySpace. www.myspace.com/nahlidge508

Or you can follow me on Twitter. www.twitter.com/nahlidge

There`s a lot of ways you can get in touch with me or just watch/listen to what I been up to. If you like what you see/hear. Lemme know and I`ll be sure to keep you updated when new shit comes along.

Peace.